True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
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