I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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