On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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