ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
What drink are we having for lunch?
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize
