I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
