Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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