their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize
