You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I believe in your delicious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize