whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
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