i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize