just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize