Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
