My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
