I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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