We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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