I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
one two three fourrrrnication!
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
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