Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
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