Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
Acid is not a monday night drug
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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