actually, I'm a sock model
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
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