i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
