I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
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