I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
