marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
