So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
