What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize