morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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