His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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