Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
