Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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