yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
