I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Randomize