My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Randomize
