i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
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