the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Randomize
