Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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