The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Randomize
