Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Randomize
