Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
she smelled like a LAN party
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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