Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Randomize