so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
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so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
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I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
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