I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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