girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize