god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
