I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
So many bounce houses so little time
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize