he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize