New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
