im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize
