Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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