no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
