I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Randomize
