how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
